a dance of goodbye

The music has changed. The DJ replace the loud music into a sweet love song. 

I was caught alone, standing in the middle of the crowd of pairs. I was walking to get out of the dance floor when someone familiar is in my way. She gives me a smile and I smile back. I was going to pass to her when she suddenly holds my hand and said "wait hugo."

She's holding my hand so tight. She began to put my hands on her hips and place her hand in my shoulder. I'm puzzled that time because months ago we had a quarrel and after that day we never been in good terms.

A while I realized we're already dancing in a song that we used to sing. I was looking at her eyes without any miss. Her lovely eyes is melting my soul. I said "hi, I'm sorry.." she urgently said "sshh.. cut it out, I know everything..."

Hearing her words is enough to give me tears. She said "why have you done that? what's your plan?" I replied "I know I will never be in your heart as it belongs to someone else." 

She started to cry and said "after knowing my dark past, you still have your affection with me." I said "my dear, I was afraid that my emotion was already driving me to nothingness. I only care for you to be happy." She says "Mike is now again my bf. and...." I interrupted and said "oh! its the end of the song. It seems there will be a heavy rain, my friend."

She asked me this "So you still going to leave us?" I look away to the vast of people and replied "I have enough of the hard things in this place, I believe my place is not, here maybe

in some place.

She ask me again. "When will I see you again?" I said "Maybe in some other time. The song has ended, what a convenient way for me to say goodbye..."

I turned my back and low my head, as the tears is heavily flowing, "well, you take a good care of yourself, don't cry again, and finally THANK YOU."

I now walk away from the dance floor. I saw Mike and passed him, I bet he saw us. I harshly walk in my car. Then I drive my car, I'm in tears and my hands are shaking...

so it is a dance of goodbye....

sadness...

I said before, you don't owe the world for an explanation. di mo kelngan sabihin saken kung anong nakaraan meron ka. ang mahalaga kung sino ka.

habang tumatagal para aqng yumayakap sa isang cactus, ang mga bawat tinik ay tuluyan tumatagos sa aking katawan, habang lumalaon... unti-unting namamatay ang isa kong pagkatao... ang sakit.. :( 

na fall inlove ako sa kanya...

kaibigan lang talaga ang tingin ko sa kanya nung una.

ilang ulit akong umiwas pero nahulog pa rin ako.

ngayon ay sasabihin ko na sa'yo ang tunay na nadarama... at sana kung anuman ang mangyari sana maging ok pa rin ang lahat.

matagal na rin pala ang huli kong paggawa ng blog

sa totoo lang marami akong gustong isulat na blog. may agam agam sa isip ko kung dapat ko iyon isulat at ibahagi. 

maglalaan ako ng panahon upang maisulat dito sa blog ang mga bagay na nais kong ibahagi. 

nais kong ibahagi dito kung pano ang mga pinaggagawa ko sa gitna ng mga pinagdadaanan ko. kung panu ang prinsipyo at paniniwala ko ay sinubok. gusto ko munang gumugol ng panahon sa pagsusulat at sa paggawa ng mga panibagong gawain. marami talaga akong gustong gawin dati pa kaya gusto ko ng gawin hanggang may oras at pagkakataon pa ko.

ang mga susunod kong mga sulatin ay marahil maibabase ko sa isang pangarap o istorya ng kaibigan ko na naibahagi sakin.

panahon na rin siguro na magdagdag ng bagong friends sa multiply ko. sa kalkula ko ay may apat na taon na rin akong may multiply. dito lang sa site na ito ako nagsusulat ng blog.

sa mga nagbabasa ng blog ko dito. wag kayong mahiyang magcomment ^ ^,

the making of "My Best friend's Wedding" [trailer]

I'm currently drafting a story piece, the "my best friend's wedding." 

-kinikilabutan aq sa story,hehe

dream more. define love.

it is a challenge for me to achieve all the plans that i set for my life. its not easy but its fun. i want to explore the world. i want to see what is beyond on those boundaries.

++++++++++

i have doubt about what love is. i don't even know what it is. i always have a misinterpretation about it or perhaps i'm lacking of it?

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i feel joy and contented with you. and you give me fear.hahaha

i give and express what i want and i'm not expecting for any returns.

"expecting is another way of hurting yourself." 

i still have a lot of things to prove... 

i pray that we could still be the same as before specially in this time full of change. ^_^

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

thoughts that circling in my mind

what an irony of life?

 i made a sincere talk with God thru a prayer. i asked Him that i want to change something in myself and my life, that i just want to be honest to everything. in just a lesser week He gave me what i've asked.

for that "i Glory Him, my Lord, my God."

++++++++++

i'm drafting the right words to say.

i need just a little more time.

i can't explain it but i feel that her true self is hiding deep inside. i have theories of event which is happening right now and i bet it to be wrong.

i don't posses abundant traits but i treasure the few that i have. i may not be one of the best people in the world but i want to grow and change for good with the people around me. those who have witnessed and accepted my weaknesses and strengths.